Because I'm a Frackin' Toaster!

Some friends blew into town for the weekend to geek out with us. Years ago this would have meant a marathon weekend involving D&D books, character sheets, cold pizza and a few gallons of Mountain Dew. We still geeked out. We just did it with better food and more sleep. Our gaming has also shifted from D&D to a combination of Rock Band (Wii) and cooperative board games like Arkham Horror.

This time around, Cainam brought Battle Star Galactica the Board Game. Everyone chooses a member of the crew, fight off toasters & spin up the FTL drive in hopes that our next jump will lead us home.

The game has one twist: Someone may be a Cylon. In fact, before the game ends, there will be at least one Cylon. Who is it? Who's working against us? Is it the Admiral? The President? Boomer?

Last night (actually the whole weekend) I was the cylon right from the word go. Whenever possible, I sabotaged the crew's efforts. Choose the better of two cards? I think not. Add extra support when victory is assured? Absolutely! Anything to throw off suspicion.

And then Cainam got a card that let him check my loyalty. Crap! What do I do? Bluff, of course! In fact, I bluffed us both into the brig long enough for the game to spiral out of control. (My job as the toaster after all!)

Note: I really only pulled this off because of a combination of luck and Cainam's reputation. I'd been the cylon in every game that weekend. So, it seemed unlikely that I would be it AGAIN. Cainam had done a number of things just before calling me a cylon that, put together, seemed suspicious. It's totally in his character to be the cylon and accuse someone else to throw off suspicions. So, he called me a cylon and I called him a lying liar. Can't believe it worked.

At some point in the game, I got officially revealed and disappeared to the resurrection ship - where I wrecked even more havoc - but not before I we able to change my wife into a Cylon too. She proceeded, in a masterful stroke, to lock everyone else up in the brig. Before they could right the ship and kill her off, Galactica was just too far gone. I was so proud!

BSG the Board Game is a total win for people who like long-play co-op games. It requires at least 3 people to play. It really takes 4 or more to make it good. Three people makes it a lot easier to find the hidden Cylon.

Good Customer Service Still Happens!

I got an email today from Netflix saying that my next DvD isn't available at a local center, but is shipping from another part of the country. Bummer right? I won't have a new DvD for days. Except, Netflix took care of that issue. They added a 4th DvD from my queue that will certainly arrive tomorrow.

I bet this was all automated. It's still great.

Too often I've seen companies fail their customer when things go wrong because they do not have effective measures for dealing with problems. Customer service doesn't have to mean that someone has to go out of their way. Good customer service means that a company has a system in place to provide good service to customers.

This is a very simple example of the right way to do business. Take care of your customer before they even ask. It's the kind of little thing that keeps me as a customer & makes me tell my friends about a business. It's true for a local store as it is for an online shop.

Awesome Nod to Firefly

Dear Firefly/Nathan Fillion Fans,

Goto Hulu immediately and watch the opening sequence of this week's "Halloween" episode of Castle. You will not be disappointed.

If you don't watch Castle, why the F#^$% not?

RSS or Visit the Page?

Today, Gamer Geek and I were reminded why visiting a website is still important. XKCD, a favorite webcomic of ours, redesigned the entire page to look like an old-school Geocities website...complete w/ under construction signs & broken links. If you've been on the web long enough, you've seen these pages (heck, you're probably had one of these pages. I know I did!)

RSS is great for reading blogs & news, but you can miss out on the creativity of a site. There's also been a long debate that RSS kills the very sites you're reading. Why? By not going to the site, you cause them traffic but fail to bring them ad revenue or ever buy their stuff. I'm not going to debate this point, I'm just mentioning it.

BTW: Just RSS my blogs. I don't care!

New Fall Network TV Line-Up is a Complete Bust

It's Fall and that means that new shows are here & old shows are returning. Here's some highlights...

The Good:

Castle - Castle picks up where it left off. It's good. The characters are well-developed. The mysteries are always interesting. The actors have chemistry. Nathan Fillion is quickly becoming my favorite actor.

House - I hate that I like this show. It's well-written, well-acted and it's just good TV. The premier was yet further proof why House is a great anti-hero.

The Bad:

Heroes - This season's villains are Carnie freaks? Really? Sigh. I keep wanting desperately to love this show. On one hand, we have House (which I should hate but love) and on the other we have Heroes (which I should love but hate.) Can't win.

Flash Forward - Epic fail! The pilot completely failed to capture the grand scope of events. The lead actors have the emotional depth of paper bags. They clearly wanted to rush forward to the broad plot of the series. In doing so, the show misses everything. The first episode should have played out like a disaster film. ER's should have looked like MASH centers. Lights should have failed to work. Cell networks should have been down for weeks. National Guard troops should have been everywhere. And really, some lowly FBI field agents are in charge? Pass...

The Ugly:

The Forgotten - Huh? Really? Regular citizens solving the unsolvable in no-time flat. Wow. That sounds really, um... Concept good. Holland Tunnel-sized holes. Pass...

NCIS LA - I love NCIS. It's almost a guilty pleasure. I laugh every time the shows tries to pretend that NCIS is some "other-spy" organization, but I accept it because the character acting is great, the plot moves along nicely and it establishes rules that conform with the Hollywood version of reality. NCIS behaves like a law-enforcement arm of the US Military. Domestic Spying was never the focus of the show's makeup. It's more of a byproduct. The spin-off, on the other hand, is all about domestic spying. The intro/cross-over episodes of NCIS last season were the worst episodes of the season. The changes for the season premier actually made things worse. The fact that the first episode started with a dead navy officer is irrelevant. It's a spy show. The premise sucks. The show sucks. The chain of command makes no sense. Their place in the grand scope of things is confusing. They have no place even in the NCIS version of reality. Don't just pass, RUN AWAY!

Letting Go of World of Warcraft Blogs

The following is a repost of my post from today on OrdoSerp, the Lord of the Rings Online blog I participate in.

Funny thing about giving up World of Warcraft...

It's life-altering.

I "forgot" to cancel my subscription last month. Part of me kept thinking I would hop back on and play. But, then I saw that I hadn't logged on since early July and I realized that my wife & I had wasted a combined $90 for July, August and September. It got easier to hit the cancel button after that.

My RSS feed contains a lot of WoW blog. It's hard to let go. But it's time to say goodbye to them too. Here is a list of the blogs & podcasts I will miss the most. (Yes, there are more. Yes, I'm pathetic.)

Goodbye Daily Druid, druid-news aggrigate extreme. I even appeared in your listings once or twice. I haven't glanced at the feed in months, so it's not a hard break for me.

Goodbye Flyv. You were a guild-mate and a teacher when I started to learn to feral tank. You've also moved on from WoW. But, your direction and my interests have drifted apart. It's time for me to accept that and move on.

For months, I really hoped Phaelia would return and provide us with more Resto4Life. Now, I'm glad you didn't. You helped make my wife an amazingly awesome tree and amused her endlessly. She had so much fun reading your blog that I started reading it and eventually tried to learn to Boomkin & Tree when the dual-spec option happened.

Goodbye Pike, reluctant leader of the hunter community. Most hunter-blogs flare bright for a while then burn out. Yet, Aspect of the Hare goes strong. Elitist Jerks may have taught me how to raid, you taught me how to enjoy it. After I swapped to full-time feral druid to off-tank for my little 10-man guild, I kept reading your blog. Now, sadly, we have no place in each other's lives. I may miss you most of all.

Goodbye Kalon and your blog ThinkTank. Think tank is the ultimate tanking (mostly feral) blog around. Yours may be the hardest break. How is it that 2 months have gone by since I last played Rhus, yet I'm still reading your theory craft? Why do I care about the Feral loot-tables in the Coliseum? Why would I care if I should keep T8 cat gear or not? (Especially since I slowed and then stopped my progression before getting any T8 gear for my cat.) Your blog is like catnip rolled in honey. What feral off-tank (current or retired) can resist you?

Goodbye Randydelux & Scott. Last week when I caught myself loading your latest podcast on my iPod before a hike, I knew it was time to stop. There are no LotRO podcasts that can even hold a candle to the Instance. I've seriously considered listening to your show just for the fun of it. It's not going to happen. ExtraLife will continue to be part of my day and I'll be tryingExtraLifeRadio.

I continue to follow and support Andrew over at Of Teeth and Claws in his game-blogging endeavors. I'm glad that he's branched out from WoW to write about all things gaming. I think his latest crusade against subscription MMO's is thought-provoking. I have a lot to say about subscription MMO's and why they work, but that's a different post.

Goodbye World of Warcraft, I've canceled my subscription, deleted all the theory-craft sites from my bookmarks and now, I'm not even going to read blogs about you.

My gaming time is now taken up by Lord of the Rings Online, Mario Kart & Rock Band 2.

Granny Did What?

As mentioned several times, one of the big highlights of our Christmas holiday was getting Slick's Granny to play Wii Bowling.

The whole thing started on a whim, like most of my crazy ideas. I generally assumed that she would talk her way out of doing it. But my mother-in-law gave me an encouraging look and I pressed on mostly for her.

Well OK, I admit that it might have been a dubious look. It's the same sort of look Slick gives me when I'm about to be excessively silly. But 70-80% of the time Slick laughs "with" me when the dust settles. Further, I haven't broken anything or ended up in an emergency room in years. What could possibly go wrong? Right?

Well...

My cell rings tonight at 8:30. It was the Queen.. We had just queued up a DvD for "movie night." I was attempting to get the DvD to skip the seemingly mandatory previews, so I just passed the phone to Slick.

"...bought a Wii!? ... Really?"

My brain, still attempting to get to the title screen, lurched at this 1/2-conversation. Did Slick just? Who? Crap...went too far...no I didn't... Wait? A What? Who? Why won't the stupid home button just... A Wii? Huh?

"Granny?"

*Pause*

My brain, having successfully convinced my fingers to click the pause button, suggests that I listen just in case I'm in trouble or something. For once, I heed it's advice.

"...has been going over in the evenings to play with her?"

I asked my brain for confirmation. Unfortunately, it can't process this strange information & locks up. I'm on my own.

Thankfully, Slick is now off the phone laughing uncontrollably. Whew! Dodged another one!

It appears that Granny had a family member pick one up when they went to the "big-town" mall. Granny can't actually turn it on by herself. Instead, Slick's Aunt has been going over in the evenings and playing with her.

Never ever underestimate so-called "old" people. They will surprise you.

Think I should get her a copy of Mario Kart (assuming I ever find myself a copy?)

On a side note: the whole thing made us extra silly, thus making Kung Fu Panda even more enjoyable.

This isn't a game...It's BOWLING

It turns out I learned something about my parents this Christmas vacation. (I may have known this and forgotten.) Growing up in a small mining town in NE Pennsylvania, they were once very serious bowlers. In another lifetime, iDad apparently won league championships and trophies.

So, it comes as no surprise that my father became obsessed with getting a very high score on my Wii. When Slick and I went out for New Years, he practiced his technique. He broke 200. He became a "Strike Machine." Of course, he learned the cold hard truth about Wii Sports - Bowling. Bowling on the Wii is not bowling. It's a fair simulation, but it's not the real deal. At some point, more "serious" play can throw off your game.

Enter iDad's nemesis...

In corner one we have...
iDad - 6' - 180lbs - Bowling Trophies - High Score on the Wii (Over 200)

In corner two we have the Grand Daughter...
"Princess Kitty" - 4' - 70lbs (maybe...dripping wet) - Has tried a Wii at a friend's house.

Kitty bowled first...

Strike... iDad was beside himself as he barely picked up his spare.

Strike... "She can't do that!" As he misses his spare.

Spare... "But she doesn't know what she's doing!"

Princess Kitty proceeded to clear all but 3 frames and bowled an incredible 179! iDad's game got progressively worse as we all howled and cheered Kitty on. We won't mention his *cough* score.

And Still We Wii

I know that I'm a tad behind the times getting a Wii this year, but wow. Even with just one controller, WiiSports and a very small space to play in the farm house, we continue to just play, play, play...

The amazing part is Slick's 81 year old Granny. She's bowling great. She only left 2 open frames last night. Sure, we're helping her position and click buttons until it's time to swing, but she's directing us. "Don't forget to move me over."

flyDad loves the golf. No surprise there. He's analyzing the course, looking for places to shorten the hole. He's reading the greens. He's then helping the rest of us when we do it.

The Queen & I are really into the tennis game. We totally need two controllers to play together. Of course, there's no room here for both of us to play anyway. Can't wait to get it home in my TV room.

I've started researching games & accessories to pick up. Obviously, we want at least one more controller. What about the voice accessory? More controllers? Do we want the Fit (Which is expensive.) Can't wait to get it hooking up to my network and try out all the other features as well. Cainam has already told me that we can Mario Kart together over the internet.

Slick wants a guitar game. She's just not sure which. So, we have to look into that as well. My gut says that we'll get a 2nd controller, a guitar game & a used game and enjoy those for a while.

This is seriously going to cut into our World of Warcraft time.

John Adams on DvD

A number of my readers (both family & friends) are American History buffs. To them, I say rent John Adams!

Of our founding father's, none is more perfectly simultaneously praised and vilified as our first VP John Adams. This is the man who worked with Ben Franklin & Thomas Jefferson to get the Declaration of Independence written. He's also the fool who signed the alien & sedition act. A one-term lame-duck who tried to honor Washington's wishes to remain neutral in the war between France & Great Britain even in the face of saber rattling inside his own cabinet.

HBO did a mini-series on the life of John Adams which is now available on DvD. For anyone with a passing interest in the Revolution, the founding fathers or the early years of our great nation, this is a must see.

As a person who grew up fed on the "perfection" of Washington, Jefferson, Adam, Franklin...well, Franklin was the "odd" "eccentric" grandfather in the room. We were taught to laugh at his antics & admire him even more. Instead, HBO humanizes these men. He paints a deeply flawed Adams, a hopelessly idealistic Jefferson, a Franklin who knew "the game" of politics and enjoyed it a bit too much. Only Washington remained the larger than life figure I remember from history classes. Yet, even Washington was painted a pawn to Hamilton's federalist ambitions.

This HBO series is the kind of dramatic interpretation that rekindles my curiosity and makes me want to dig through my college books.

Watch it. Love it. Note that the minor historical inaccuracies or simplifications mean nothing. They have captured the time, the events and the emotions to make them more real than real. HBO films did such an incredible job casting Paul Giamatti that I forgot thinking about him as the actor.

You will learn to simultaneously love and despise John Adams by watching this film.

Almost Like Losing a Member of the Family

Majel Barrett Roddenberry died this week. She is the voice of the ship computers, she was Nurse Chapel, she was Troy's mom. When she did a guest appearance on Babylon 5 it was a sign to a lot of us fans that the show had arrived in SciFi circles. There has never been Trek without her. She will be in the upcoming JJ Abrams reboot, but after that...

Trek has been a part of my life for so long. I was in high school when the Next Generation came out. My friends, the geeks that we were, all took on the persona of crew members. Being the youngest & shortest I was, sigh, Wesley. Actually, they called me Mr Crusher. :-D

This is something I've kept hidden for years because of all the Wesley-haters out there.

But frankly, Will Wheaton and his blog is becoming a sort of hero of mine, so I don't care who knows anymore.

In our 2nd year of college, every night 11PM was "Trek" time. So many people watched the nightly ST:TNG reruns that you could walk the halls of my dorm (men's and women's sides) and never miss a beat from the episode. Star Trek movies would often come out just in time for my birthday. Our old Nissan still has my "Klingon Warrior Academy" window sticker on it.

I just plain like Trek.

Thanks for helping to keep your husband's dream alive and for being a part of my life for so long. You will be missed.

Would You Shut Up & Let Them Debate!

On Sunday, Meet the Press nearly featured a really great debate about health care between Gov Granholm (D) of Michigan & former Gov Romney (R-MA). Unfortunately, David Gregory cut them off.

The core question was the magical $2000/car extra labor cost. Both governors were articulate, knowledgeable and passionate about the issue. Gov Romney was making the union-busting argument based on the idea that American car companies can't be competitive due to all the salary & benefit costs. Gov Granholm was making the counter-argument that non-American companies have a leg-up due to government health-care and related government support. The debate, which I was very interested in, started there...

And then got quashed, dismissed really, by David Gregory. Actually, I thought his moderation style was rushed and lacking style. I don't like his presence in the least. But, I digress...

In a world of cable news & talking heads, there's never really any time for actual discourse. Everything is spun and filtered. Everything is presented in Sesame Street speed. Countdown (which I love), O'Reilly (boo), & all those shows is still just about listening to pundits ramble. Blah, blah, blah! Once and a while I want to hear people with "actual" knowledge & passion about an issue engage in healthy discussion. More importantly, I was really impressed with both of the Governors and wanted to hear where this was going.

The problems with the "big 3" are broader than the UAW, but the way that this is handled is going to have lasting ramifications for the American labor force. So, I don't get why these two had to be cut short so we could listen to David Gregory talk to two other reporters about how Obama's transition team is or isn't managing the Blagojevich question.

Maybe my real problem is that I'm a big enough dork to watch Meet the Press.

Legend of the Seeker

One of the best fantasy writers I've had the pleasure of reading is Terry Goodkind. His "Wizard's First Rule" was an instant classic and launched The Sword of Truth, a series of dark and violent sword and sorcery style books centering around a young protagonist named Richard Cypher. My good friends Crash & Cainam are huge fans of the series. I unfortunately found myself forced to stop after the 3rd or 4th book. Goodkind's descriptions of Richard's various "trials" became too much for me. I am not a "detached observer" when I read books. Still, I recommend any fantasy fan pick up the first book and go from there.

So today when I came across a new show on Hulu based on the Sword of Truth series, I tuned it. In the muddy and disappointing waters of fantasy TV, the pilot episode of "Legend of the Seeker" stands out. While it essentially follows the same basic premise of the first few chapters of "Wizard's First Rule," it's admittedly not on par with the books. It faces a daunting problem for fans of the books because it very quickly avoids many of the moral grey areas that make the books what they are. Book to TV/Movie purists like Cainam will be hard-pressed to like this show.

Given all the crap in the fantasy/scifi TV genre, past and present, this pilot stands firmly in the middle. For every Battlestar Galactica there's an equally horrible show like the original Battlestar Galactic and it's spin-off BGS 1980. *puke* Even the best, long-running shows like Stargate & Star Trek:TNG started with so-so pilots. And while there are also plenty of quality modern fantasy shows like Buffy the Vampire Slayer, there is a massive void in the classic sword and sorcery end of the spectrum. There have been modest attempts in the past like the short-run Roar with a very young Heath Ledger. There have been tons of OK miniseries like Earthsea. Still, the most popular shows I can think of were the Hercules & Xena shows. This pilot, while cut from the same cloth, was much better than your standard Kevin Sorbo fare.

If this review is leaving you with a lukewarm feeling, I understand. Still, if your a fan of the genre, it's worth checking out. I assume that it's available on cable TV, so set your DVR and watch when you're looking for a distraction. Or if you're like me, catch it on Hulu while playing Warcraft or writing in your blog.

addition

I just watched episode 3. I take back what I say about it being "much better than you standard Kevin Sorbo fare." Now that they've covered the backstory, it's essentially Hercules without the campy humor. The special effects are modernized & the fight-sequence use some Matrix-style slow-mo, but it's still just another legendary journey. Sigh!

Frustrating Weekend

After a wonderful date w/ my wife Friday night, I was so eager to get my day started Saturday. I felt ready to be productive around the house, ready to for some solid gaming time on the 2nd full weekend of the new World of Warcraft: Wrath of the Lich King expansion.

Then at 8:30AM, I realized that the "unthinkable" had happened with my gaming account. After years of system security obsession, my game password had been stolen. I had been Hacked. (Click the link to get the whole story.) Blizzard Entertainment had taken the necessary steps to freeze my account and start restoring my virtual stuff. Unfortunately, the damage had already been done. I obsessively needed to do a complete security review of every piece of hardware and software on my home network. No cleaning, yard work, meals or anything would get done until I knew that I knew the cause for this breach & had quashed it.

I'll skip the boring details and just say that I used "not my regular" computer to log on to WoW after it had been turned off for a while but before new virus definitions could be loaded. I should have, duh, changed my password (sooner than my usual once every 60 days) but it never dawned on me that I could actually have been hacked.

I'm back on the game today. I've made adjustments to my system security and have purchased authenticator keys which will make my video game security more protected than most online bank accounts. Sad really!

But, that one event was like a snowball at the top of a miserable weekend. I was pissy about the computer security. Slick was pissy about things needing to get done while I was dealing with the computers. Eventually we got a little pissy at eachother. Eventually we got a lot pissy at eachother. "Fights" are so rare in our household, that to have one on my birthday weekend is like the biggest anti-gift ever.

Thankfully, the whole thing became a catharsis for us. We both eventually started laughing and being really obnoxious with one another. Stuff started getting accomplished. And, while my account lock-out frustration kept rearing it's ugly head, we just kept moving past it to find "something better" to do with our time.

Sunday proved to be a bit better. Still no game access, but we moved passed that to get an over-due Costco trip out of the way. The house cleaning was finished for our guests. I accepted the reality of things. Slick played WoW and I watched my Tropic Thunder DvD from Netflix. Not our usual, intended, Sunday night, but it worked out.

It's going to be a good week with Slick's family and that's all that matters...that and questing after everyone goes to bed. Must level my Feral Druid Tank to 80 before Christmas vacation!

Bond, James Bond

Last night, Slick took me to see Quantum of Solace. Let me cut to the chase and say, I enjoyed it. Instead of giving a potentially spoiler-ridden review of the film, I bring context for the life-long Bond film fan.

In an odd way, I have not seen a more angry, driven 007 since License to Kill (1989.) Yes, I acknowledge that Dalton's two lackluster outings are barely worth mentioning in the cannon of Bond films, but hear me out. Of the 22 (23, or do you really think "we" could forget Never Say Never Again!) theatrical releases, three stand out above all others as containing moments where Bond reached real moments of happiness, even contentment only to have them shattered by tragedy that can't just be forgotten with a quip, a drink & a one-night stand.

One was Felix's wedding at the beginning of License to Kill. One dead Mrs Leiter & a shark-eaten Felix later and we have Bond forgetting Queen & Country and focusing only on revenge. It was a disappointing film, yes, but it's still the best way I can describe Bond's mindset at the start of Quantum. Or is it?

Consider if you will, On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969.) At the end of this singular George Lazenby (who?) portrayal, Bond gets married to Tracy only to have her killed by Blofeld in the closing sequence. Yes, Lazenby was a disappointing Bond. But, it was one of my favorite Bond films. (Just missed my top 5 at #6!) And it ended tragically with the death of Bond's one true love. "There is no hurry...We have all the time in the world."

Tracy Bond is the "one true love" alluded to throughout over 40 years of Bond films. When Bond drinks all those Martini's and sleeps with all those women, is he trying to block out all the faces of all the men he's killed or is he trying to forget the face of that one woman?

Unfortunately, Bond fans had to wait over a decade (6 Bond films) for anything remotely qualifying as "continuity" for the opening sequence of For Your Eyes Only (1981.) Sadly, this continuity comes only as part of a truly disappointing opening sequences. Here we see Bond at Tracy's graveside before a harrowing remote-controlled helicopter ride at the hands of Blofeld. (Remember that one?)

What might have been if Sean Connery or a very young Roger Moore had been given the opportunity to chase Blofeld & Specter for the death of his wife in an entire film?

This is the true beauty of the Daniel Craig reboot. Unlike the decade following Tracy Bond's film death, we didn't have to wait to see the weakest of all Bond pre-credit opening sequences to see Bond get Blofeld. Unlike License to Kill, we didn't have to agonize through a bad 80's drug-lord story-line to see Bond driven for blood.

Casino Royale (2006) brought us the new Tracy, aka Vesper, for a new era. And in this new era, Quantum tosses aside Bond-film tradition and picks up where we left off, with an angry Bond grappling with loss, betrayal, resentment and a growing addiction to vodka. To make it worse for Bond, everyone else that he's remotely close to end up in danger in this film. This just serves to fuel the fire. It is pulse pounding. And how does Craig pull it off?

Craig's Bond in Quantum is a joyless, haunted killer on the verge of falling off a cliff. Gone is the disarming charm of Sean Connery or the silly ease of Roger Moore. But gone too is the forgettable acting of Lazenby and Dalton. Where Pierce Brosnan might have taken all the best laughs from Connery and Moore, Craig has taken all of their screen presence.

It is Bond's joylessness that has simultaneously become my biggest lament and biggest cause for praise of this film.

As for actual stuff about the film? Do you expect me to talk? No Mr Reader, I expect you to see the film!

Bonus Material:

LRN talks favorite Bond Films - I can pick out favorite moments from just about every Bond film. The second I start singling out 4 or 5 "favorites" someone will quickly ask how I can forget From Russia with Love or For Your Eyes Only. To you I say, make your own list!

- The Spy Who Loved Me (1977) - While Eva Green, aka Vesper, nearly dethroned her, Barbara Bach, aka Agent Triple X, is my favorite Bond "girl." This is the movie with the Lotus Esprit as a sub. The hot Russian agent, the return of Jaws to kill them both, Roger Moore at his prime and one hell of a kickass opening downhill ski chase.

- Goldfinger (1964) - When accounting for favorite Bond, best overall plot, villain, and considering everything that should be in a Bond film, this is my OTHER favorite Bond film. Not only does it have two of the best Bond quotes, it's got Oddjob! And..."My name is Pussy Galore." "Of course you are!"

- Octopussy (1983) - Perhaps it was because I first saw it at just the right age to start getting the sexual references. Perhaps I just loved the Bede BD-5J mini-Jet. Octopussy is a personal favorite without any redeeming qualities.

- Tomorrow Never Dies (1997) - I still contend that Pierce Brosnan got the Bond role 10 years too late. But, then again, if he had gotten it "on time" he may never have gotten to team up with Michelle Yeoh for one of the most creative motorcycle chases in film.

- Casino Royale (2006) - I admit being perfectly blown away by Craig's opening sequence, by Eva Green's piercing eyes, Judi Dench's solidly locking down her place as the best M of them all and the best overall Bond plot since the early days of Dr No & From Russia with Love.

And where do I stack the new movie up with these? That remains to be seen.

PS. Opening sequence music was meh! I like Jack White. I appreciate Alicia Keys. I think they should have listened to Sheena Easton, Duran Duran, Paul McCartney's openings a little more. They knew Bond music. Granted, big surprise, my favorite Bond song is from my favorite Bond movie because Nobody Does It Better sung by Carly Simon.

PPS. To Avouz & Crash, my fellow Bond geeks, it's good! You will not be disappointed!

Star Wars vs Star Trek

This is a follow-up of sorts to my really negative review of the Clone Wars DvD last week.

First up, the new Star Trek movie trailer is up and it's absolutely perfect.

Official Star Trek Trailer

Once in a great while, a trailer comes along that just gets me jacked up for a movie. The first Spiderman movie trailer, the first trailer for Watchmen with the Smashing Pumpkins music as the background, etc.

I am so jacked up about JJAbrams reboot of Star Trek, words can not describe...

But I digress.

So, what does this have to do with Star Wars? I'll let Scott Kurtz do my talking for me.


Sometimes guys like Kurtz, Johnson & Kovalic are able to say things in comics that we would never dare say and yet they just sum up everything in a few comic panels.

Of course, none of these "titans" of online comics do it better than XKCD.

Clone Wars

Every now and then a movie or video game disappoints me even when I've already set my expectations impossibly low. This is one of those times.

The new Star Wars: The Clone Wars animated feature recently arrived on DvD and found it's way into my Netflix queue. It was "highly" anticipated this summer, but I skipped it to watch on my small, yet big, screen. This new story of the intervening years between episodes 2 & 3, was also the launch-point for the new series appearing on Cartoon Network.

I have stated, numerous times to anyone who would listen, that the original Cartoon Network series of animated shorts is one of the finest parts of the Star Wars saga. The artistic style made famous in the Emmy award-winning Samaria Jack series was further proof that American animation could be as inventive and revolutionary as Japanese Anime. It was also further testimony that the animated medium could offer quality and compelling story-telling for adults and still be accessible for kids. It also saved the larger Star Wars saga for me, enabling me to rewatch the prequels and even connect with Anakin Skywalker.

Alas, Lucas Films is clearly plotting to destroy my last best hope for preserving my favorite childhood franchise with their latest film.

I want to start by saying that the film wasn't "bad." Nor can I say that the CGI was "bad." Sure, I miss the old animated style and that longing was sure to taint my perspective. They did a fine job. It wasn't mind blowing good. I think it should have been their goal. Knowing that they wanted to morph this into a weekly TV show probably shaped their decisions. If it was too perfect, the bar would be way too high to reproduce week in and week out. Still, my issue was and is not with the CGI.

The film had horrible pacing. The acting and dialog was so-so. There were times when I actively wondered if the actors had all done their lines separately in sound rooms and then it was all spliced together. The best animation can be destroyed by really bad acting. It's why some Anime (like Akira) must be watched in it's original Japanese. Inflection, tone, mood, interaction are all set by good voices doing their jobs right. That's not to say I disliked their voices, but it just didn't work.

It felt like a kids movie and not in a good way. I know that Lucas' intended goal was to make this for younger viewers. I don't fault him there. But great films for kids end up being great films for adults too. Movies like Disney's Aladin or Pixar's Finding Nemo are instant classics for all ages. I know adults who quote Finding Nemo that don't even have kids. That's quality cinema. So, I refuse to give Lucas a pass for the "Huttling" or the totally Gay Uncle the Hut. In fact, Lucas should be ashamed for drawing on such classic stereotypes for creating characters like that. Especially when the film is aimed at kids. Star Wars has it's androgynous token gay character. Adding a "flamboyant" hutt was in poor taste.

Still, the failure of the film was not the animation style, the phoned in voices, the bad choices in character creation, or even the truly flimsy plot (which was waifer thin.) No, the agregious problem was pacing.

It could have easily been done as 2 to 3 part premier episode of a TV series. It didn't have a sweeping movie plot. It didn't transition from event to event well. The sense of drama was completely lost. The big climatic moment of the film perfectly positioned itself to make a nice squishy plop like that of a freshly produced cow-pie. It was warm, stinky and you really wanted to avoid stepping in it. So close to a real Star Wars fight, but no.

And so, this is what they want us to ignore/replace the original Clone Wars series with? This marketing contrived, shallow, cow-pie of a movie?

I was so utterly disappointed with this film, I paused it several times to do some email, make some calls, by my wife's birthday presents on Amazon.com. Each time I went back expecting the next scene to be the one that propells this new franchise and convinces me to spend money to watch future episodes on DvD or iTunes.

Use the FORCE George, because it's the only thing you've got keeping me from never looking at another Star Wars product again.

The Versatility of Karl Urban

Every now and then, Hollywood gives us an actor with versatility and the "hey wait, isn't that..." surprise. The amazing thing is the number of these guys who've been in Lord of the Rings. And yet, few seem to surprise me like Karl Urban. He's no leading man. He's not academy award kind of guy. Yet he's gotten some interesting supporting roles & he changes with the role.

It's hard to connect the assassin from Bourne Supremacy to Eomer in Lord of the Rings to Vaako from the Chronicles of Riddick, but I assure you that they are all the same guy. And now, to really shock and confuse your senses, I realized today that he's playing the new JJ.Abrams version of Dr McCoy from the USS Enterprise!

Frankly, I don't know which is more unsettling; hearing Silar say "Illogical" or hearing Vaako say, "He's dead, Jim!" Sadly, I have to wait until May to hear both.

Fall TV

Over the last few days, NothingKnew & Cats both expressed confusion about the Fall TV line-up. As luck would have it, I've been making a list. So, here it is. It's not everything. I don't have cable nor do I like "reality" TV.

Sundays
8PM Football NBC 36.1

Mondays
8PM - 18.1 - Terminator (Premiere 9/8)
9PM - 36.1 - Heroes (Premiere Sept 22 - 8PM 3hours)
10PM - 36.1 - My Own Worst Enemy (Premiere 10/13)

Tuesdays
8PM - 3.1 - NCIS (9/19)
9PM - 18.1 - Fringe (Premiere 9/9 - 8PM ~2hours)

Wednesdays
8PM - 36.1 - Bones (9/10)
9PM - 3.1 - Criminal Minds (9/20)

Thursdays
8PM - 46.1 - Smallville (Premier 9/28)
9PM - 3.1 - CSI (Premiere 10/9)

Fridays
8PM - 36.1 - Crusoe (Premier 10/17 8PM 2hours actual time?)
10PM - 3.1 - Numbers (9/22)

And yes, I noticed my apparent fascination with investigation dramas. But, it seems like all of TV is now these reality game shows or CSI/L&O shows.

Why The Sarah Connor Chronicles Are Worse Than Star Trek Voyager

Every week Cameron gets more beat up than Voyager ever did. Yet, every week she fit and polished from stem to stern. At least Voyager reasonably tried to answer this issue with the old "mine enough fuel from that planet and we can replicate a new bulk-head" strategy. Voyager even had the "Year from Hell" episodes. Granted they all went through yet another temporal anomaly so everyone (with speaking parts) lived. But I digress...

...Well actually, I have no point. Although, I could take this moment to be a complete dork and tell you that Seven of Nine would totally kick Cameron's ass! I won't, but I could.

This is the moment when NothingKnew finds this exact senerio on the web under Rule #34 only involving jello.

Sigh! Someone, anyone (J.M.S., Whedon, JJ, Ron Moore) save us from this wasteland of bland network SciFi. Actually, rumors are that Heroes will recapture some of it's season 1 magic. I won't hold my breath.