John Street did what?

Why did the Philly mayor leave the iPhone line?

OK, why does my hometown have to make national news for this kinda stupid crap?

Mayor Street gets in line for an iPhone and then leaves prematurely when he's reminded that the City o' Bro-Love is going to hell in a hand-basket right under Street's reading glasses? There are soooo many things wrong with this story.

1) No self-respecting tech-geek who gets in line at 3am for a new gadget leaves the line early unless it's in an ambulance. Seriously! You act all nerd-core, but you're a fan-boy!

2) When you are asked why you are standing in line for anything instead of being at work, always say, "I took the day off for this." Never ever say something stupid like, "I can do my job where I am." quote

3) OK, John...sigh...I know you're the dumbest mayor since that guy from D.C. BUT for crying out loud, learn to spin! You want an iPhone? You want to sit in line for it? Make it a frackin' publicity stunt! Get the news people out there with you and talk about how you want to lead a technological revolution. Talk about your plans to cover the city in WiFi hotspots. When some punk kid asks you about the murder rate, talk about how technology can lead us into a bright future.

4) When you are the most powerful man in one of the top 10 cities in America, you find an intern to sit in your place. It's better to have a story out that you wasted an intern's day in line than your own.

5) Dude...did you see what you're wearing? If you're gonna wear a hat in public, show some pride! Put on a Phillies cap! Seriously, do I have to think of everything?

6) Finally, after this stunt, just stick with your iPod. After your term is up, you won't need the "phone" features...nobody's gonna call you!

Update: John got his iPhone! And apparently he did use a bit of suggestion #3. Someone must have sent him these suggestions on his now "obsolete" blackberry. Lord, this story almost makes me glad I moved to the south...